Someone pointed out a characteristic of our culture that shows up when we disagree with each other. He used the metaphor of a “prize fight” where you have a winner and a loser. As I thought about it, I could see it in political, religious, and personal values. Disagreement can generate the win/lose mentality pretty quickly. This same person suggested”dancing” as another metaphor that could be helpful in many situations. “Dancing” involves engaging another person with a sense of give and take where we speak and listen. This allows us both to grow in understanding and perhaps even think of things differently.

The reason I bring this up has to do with our conversations with people who aren’t part of the “Kingdom of God” who may see things quite differently. Topics could include the existence of God, evolution, Jesus, homosexuality, abortion, and the list goes on and on. I’m wondering if in our conversations on these highly volatile matters, having the “dancing” model may be helpful. I can have my points of view without compromise, however the point is not to “win” but to engage and interact. My suspicion is that many people who react so negatively with aspects of the Kingdom have that “prize fight” mentality. Perhaps that is why they can be so confronting and inflexible.

What happens if we “dance” in those settings!

• Tell me more about how you see this.
• What are the big picture issues that you see here? Here are the big picture issues I see.
• What in your experience has led you to this position?  My experience has been…
• Have you ever thought about…? I have been thinking about…
• Let’s talk about this again sometime.

Lots of folks have been telling us for a long time that developing personal relationships is the best method of communicating the Gospel in our world.  When we get to points of disagreement with those not in the Kingdom (or those in the Kingdom for that matter), “Dancing with the Stars” might really work better than “World Wrestling Federation.”

How does this get practical? How does one learn to dance? See the examples of Abraham and God in Genesis 18 and Jesus’ interactions with the disciples and the Pharisees.

Blessings in all things!
Ted